Britney, you've done it again.
A few years ago, when you were cleanly shaven, drove around with your kids on your lap, and stabbed paparazzo with umbrellas, I was convinced that you were perfect. Last Thursday I realized, however, that you were missing one thing: a successful single since 1999. Well, Till the World Ends, the second single on "FEMME FATALE," is just what we, the American public, needed.
Thank you Britney for giving me the strength as a woman to carry on. You have empowered me. I no longer drink myself to sleep because of my monthly gifts. I no longer cry every time I watch Extreme Home Makeover. I no longer watch America's Next Top Model thinking that if I were given that opportunity, I could lose the 60 pounds it would take to be a model. Today, I am a new woman. I couldn't take it take it take no more. I have never felt like felt like this before. C'mon get me get me on the floor, DJ whatcha whatcha waitin' for!?
It's Britney Bitch.
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